Floored by the Lord

 I finished the 1933 Mickey Mouse pattern yesterday, praise Jesus. Took five days to finish. And crocheted the Mickey Mouse pumpkin I've been wanting to make for some time now...bought the Etsy pattern and made it all in the same day. Took a couple hours.  I've had a full day. I got most of the items on my to-do list done...the last of which being Blogger.  The rest of the items on the list were none-too fascinating. Chores, mostly. I wanted to scan the recent Mickey Pattern I bought, with pieces taped together, but it wouldn't fit on my printer. I may have to try mobile. Just not now...big day. My credit card is both paid off and I cancelled it...again. We'll see how long it lasts. That happened at a good time, because Maranda invited me out to the mall with her son and Aaliyah, and so I went sans credit card.  I felt the real pinch, though a pleasant one in the end, of being forced to stay in a $20 cash budget. Aaliyah got $10 to play with. :) I browsed a lot of cr...

1933 Mickey  Doll is coming along.  I got caught up on chores.  Payday tomorrow. Work today. Halloween prep..ugh. Not a fan of the dark stuff.  Still thinking of Mike. Dunno if I'll dream of him or not.  Also, yay for Grandpa's 85th birthday ! 

I didn't know Mike well. I was acquainted, mostly in my early 20s and didn't stay in contact after that. Saw him again maybe what felt like 10 years ago or so.  Still...it hits different. When you feel someone was definitely not saved, even a nice person, and they die....and it hits you that at this very moment they are in a very literal place of darkness and flames and torment.... Someone you once talked or joked with.. And then you take it further when you realize what's gonna happen to them and everyone else after Jesus comes back...a very literal throwing into a pit of unending fire, where their bodies will burn perpetually and eternally... And you feel sorry (to put that lightly) for them...it hits different.  You wouldn't want that for them, or anyone obviously, but you know that's the reality. So, in a way I am grieving over Mike's death...not as if I knew him well but because I don't believe he was saved when he suddenly died.  I tried praying about ...

God is faithful. Psalm 36:5 , “Your mercy, O Lord, is in the heavens; Your faithfulness reaches to the clouds Weeks ago I qualified to get a food box from a local church food drive.  Today, I both did a food stamps interview AND I applied for deferment to help my battle with student loans. My phone bill also went down from $60 to $25 due to T-Mobile 's billing error.  Jen protested about the food stamps at first, because she receives them and we live on the same land...and I pay her rent (whether or not she reports it is her knowledge) but I chose not to argue...as is God's way. I did what I usually do. Go to a private place to my knees and cry to Him. If he felt I shouldn't apply, I'd accept. If he felt I should, I'd accept.  I wasn't angry at her. But I only wanted His leading and intervention. Which He promptly did.  He always does.  She knows its my habit to go cry. (An insecure voice says maybe she rolls her eyes at it by now) I don't know if she knows...

The other day I started my day by confessing, for the first time, my long history of abuse to a family member. Including from my aunt, God rest her soul. Brought us, back, a few bad memories. I had very few good memories of her, but she asked my forgiveness when she clearly knew she was dying, and I readily gave it. I saved over 500 new family photos, memories and a few ancestors. Even the family tree Jen out together. Below is one I found of a bunch of animals. The past week it seems I've been looking for many chances to go out and spend up my savings on stuff I don't need, despite a short pay period this month.  I went from 300 to 222 dollars. Some necessary...some not.  Last night I did something that could get me fired. I left the cash register drawer out on the legacy desk, (so awful I hesitated to write it)  We weren't closed, and though I kept it within a few feet of me, I put it down to go make a purchase at the register with Kelsey.  I felt so very horrible ...

 My title posts have not been much, lately. Thank you God, Jesus, for everything written. I'd have to think for a minute if I want to remember the major events of the past couple weeks. This thing of working with Jesus (Hey - Suse) is getting better, if 'better' means I'm being more tolerable and accepting.  I did wind up talking to Lindy about it and she said she'll talk and see if it's at least related to any illness. She told me to mentally track his bathroom trips and I did, and it didn't go any different than expected. So I told her that later. Else: I've been continuing working on my princess crochet collection. The spaghetti dinner at church went amazing and the kids had a blast. I took videos and photos. I've been working a LOT and casually doing cardio at the gym when I'm able. I bought the NLT Illustrated Study Bible and I'm already getting some use out of it. Bought bug traps and they've made live easier. Fleas are worse. Despi...